I guess because it’s been rainy and
semi-cold and just plain yucky these past couple days, I have just been in the
mood for chili! I don’t really make it that often, even during the winter time,
because….well, I don’t really know why not. I just never think of it. So last night,
I made a basic chili – sirloin ground beef, kidney beans, black beans,
chili spices and tomato paste. It was perfect for my craving!
After I ate though, I was getting into
the shower and I stood in the mirror and just had a mini-meltdown. When did I
let myself go so bad and why was I not more angry and motivated to fix it?! In
my early 20’s, I would starve myself all day long if I saw a bloated stomach
(not literally, but you get my point) and now, I just ignore it and stuff
more food into my mouth as I watch tv on the couch. I mean, I have done SOOO much
better in the last couple months and have lost some weight, but the point of
all this is that I just don’t understand when and why I basically just stopped
caring about myself. And it’s frustrating.
And I feel like it’s all I ever think,
talk, write and complain about, but yet I can’t stick with anything. I start
going to the gym and within a month, I’ve lost all motivation. I eat healthy
for a couple weeks and then have a binge weekend of Burger King and ice cream
(which thankfully hasn’t happened in a looong time!)
I just need that “thing” that makes my
body switch into motivation mode. I need “the final straw” for me. I need
someone to kick me in my freakin a** and tell me to get into gear.
What was your “moment” that kicked
your booty into gear?
I think seeing myself and really
looking at myself in the mirror last night may have been it. This is the
heaviest I’ve ever been in my entire life. 70 pounds over what I was in high school!
And these past couple months I’ve used the “I’m too busy” or “I’m too stressed”
excuses more than ever. And yes I am busy and stressed, but who cares! The fat
that is accumulating around my stomach sure enough doesn’t!
Uugh!
I just want to lose this weight. I really do.
you can do it!! Dont give up! My point was well I have two I got my wedding dress and went to put it on two weeks before and it was too small when it fit fine when I got it then I went on my honeymoon and a trip to new orleans and I came back got on the scale and it showed me 200even I freaked out and got into working out right away I'm still working on it 2years later due to my laziness but I plan to officially be at goal by the end of the year
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